SyFy "Eats Up" the Summer

What can I say, I had a bit of a bump between my last post and this post.  Doesn't mean that I had given up on my enjoyment of "B-Movies."   To be honest, some of them don't even deserve a "B-Movie" Rating. 

Just last night, I was laying down to catch up my kingdom (in "Kingdom Age") on my iPad, when WA-LA - there was "Piranhaconda!"

I had to watch!

While not the campy gore of Sharktopus, Piranhaconda offered a semi-serious story of screaming botoxed women.  Men are usually not botoxed on SyFy.  Prinhaconda offered plenty of gore, but in some cases, the people were consumed "way too fast." 

I'm certain that it will be replaying; however, next week is "Arachnoquake".  Some how, I'm not 100% certain about this one.   2-Headed Shark, Sharktopus, and Prianhaconda.  Those are worthy creatures. 

Like the 2-Headed Shark, I am debating Piranha 3DD.   The trailer is too funny!   I fail to see how a straight guy would not watch the show.   LOL

What I'm Watching This Month

Plenty of new geek shows to wrap your mind around, but in my opinion, not all of them are worth the trouble.  Here are a few:

• The Fades, on BBC, actually got off to a good start.  Slightly different take on the horror aspect and actually went with ghosts who eat people and become zombish.  Giving it a chance
• Lost Girl, on Syfy - I've only seen the first episode.  The ads for the other shows have turned me off.  I will probably force myself through another episode or two.  DVR a few more trys.
• Being Human - Syfy American Version - is actually picking up some speed.   The more they move away from the BBC version, the more I am enjoying it.
• Game of Thrones - HBO - Isn't on right now.  I just wanted to mention that I miss it.
• Grimm - My brother is watching it.  I've given it a few tries.  May try to DVR it again.  Same holds true for Once Upon a Time.
• Face Off - on Syfy - isn't anything spectacular, but I'm watching it.  Amazing work.
• Top Chef: Texas, on Bravo, is another round of fairly decent chefs; however, being originally from Texas, I am enjoying this one.  Usually have to catch this on one a rerun, I am usually watching Middle as a buildup to Modern Family.

I know that there are a few others, but it is a tad early for me to try to think of all of them.  Recommendations are highlighted.

SyFy Sharktopus

The Dresden Files

"An age which is incapable of poetry is incapable of any kind of literature except the cleverness of a decadence." Raymond Chandler

"By denying scientific principles, one may maintain any paradox." Galileo Galilei

The Netflicks addiction continues.

I have downloaded the first and only season of SyFy's The Dresden Files (based on Jim Butcher's novels). When I saw Harry's vintage Jeep, I knew the series was worth trying--what else would a wizard drive? Surely not a Volkswagen.

Technology's aversion to Dresden alludes to the conflict of science and magic, superstition and reason: a dichotomy in which science has been privileged since--well for a long time. Computers, CDs, phones all malfunction around him; they stop working. Technology itself is in denial of any alternative reality.

Dresden's name ties him to a city renowned for beauty, as well as one of the most horrific bombings of WWII. The name captures the tension between the artistry of Europe and the mindless destructiveness of science. Back to his Jeep--a symbol of American industrial-military power (a much more appropriate vehicle than the VW in the novels). At its best, The Dresden Files balances on that precipice, contrasting the two worlds. An aside--Pan's Labyrinth creates an evocative, thoughtful reflection on the clash.

After watching seven episodes, I can see the network driven constraints, as the show slips into tired cliches. At times the script sounds like a poor parody of Chandler or Hammett.

Still, Dresden is worth a visit--whether or not you are dealing with neighborhood trolls.

Bayard

Ghost Hunters

One of my favorite lines in Ghost Hunters is when they yell out, "We aren't here to hurt you." Haven't these guys watched any ghost movies, read any ghost stories, in the last 50 years? When has a ghost ever been on the receiving end when the hurting is handed out? "Are you innocent?" How many ghosts would answer that one truthfully?

Every time I watch this show, I begin running through some of my favorite ghost stories and movies.

• Thirteen Ghosts
• The Grudge
• The Shining
• The Willows
• Ringu
• The Ghost and Mrs. Muir

Granted, some of them are more dangerous than others. (A ranking.)

Anyway, with sounds, flickering shadows, and doors swinging shut, the season ends much better than it began. Actually, I am not sure if this is the season finale--it is billed as the "Mid-Season Finale." Does that mean the season is finished being halfway over? (Wow--the power of the Internet. They have online ghost hunter training!)

Bayard

Destination Truth

It has been a hectic week, and I came home to escape. A game of Halo only reinforced the failures of the week. Thankfully, Destination Truth was on SyFy. Cryptozoology at its most exciting.

As I have mentioned elsewhere, I have the sneaking suspicion that Josh Gates is not a true believer. (Now, Jason and Grant? They are zealots.) Anyway, Josh seems comfortable maintaining a tongue-in-cheek approach to his ventures into the spooky. Whether it is in the Mongolian deserts looking for a devil worm or on a small Mexican island covered with seriously creepy dolls, Josh maintains a quirky monologue that suggests it is all in fun, a means to an end--and the end is SyFy springing for another road trip with some of his buds. (See his map of cool destinations, and tell me he doesn't look a bit smug.)

Josh is fun until he slips, asking to be taken as seriously as Jason and Grant. And at that point, I am disappointed. (I mean it is not like he has the techno gear and professional affiliations.)

Wanting to change to her tele-novellas, the wife asks if I am actually watching. Of course not. Listening to the voice punctuated by the yelps of startled investigators is strangely comforting after a week at work with drama queens.

Ghost Hunters -- 100th Episode

I have to begin with a disclaimer.

By 8:30, I had begun reading League of Extraordinary Gentlemen and by 9:20, I was asleep.


The sleep had nothing to do with the graphic novel. The 100th episode of Ghost Hunters, on the other hand, probably led to the headache which prompted me to escape into oblivion.
Watching the first ten minutes was painful—perhaps even more so than watching Steve in high school trying to impress the head cheerleader (after she had turned him down for prom because “she was baking cookies”).

The notion of interviewing the cast and asking them softball questions is standard, overused fair. Every sitcom in the last 25 years has celebrated its success with a similar panel discussion. The problem with the premise is we don’t like the celebrities we like the characters. (Of course, they are oblivious to this-they think we love them for who they are—actors hiding behind the masks of interesting people.) This was awkwardly different. These are characters who are celebrities.

At first it seems, fresh, new, and engaging. We like these guys. These geeks. But the problem is we have liked and listened to them for 90 odd episodes. They are fun to hang with in the hunt. Sitting around a steamer trunk, their conversation falters. "What three things would you take to Alcatraz?” “A cat, a DVD, and a hamburger.” Uh, yeah.


We don’t want to sit down and chat with them—anymore than we want to take our Halo clan to work with us. Ever have to bring a conversation around after one of your Live buds has just finished explaining his last online battle? It’s painful. Your heart had to go out to Josh. But at least he was honest. SyFy foots his travel bill.

Yes, it was embarrassing. It is always painful to watch a friend make the stab at being a part of the inner circle. (Can't Buy Me Love, guys, is just a feel good movie. It is fiction.) I couldn’t take it. I was not there for them. I turned off the light, curled up, and listened as my wife channel surf to the Oxygen channel. She was smug; I could tell by the way she clicked the changer.

Bayard Sartoris